I owe to myself, to keep transforming. To take life’s moments, to let them fill me up. To not regret anything and take all the opportunities, even the ones that scare me. This is how I face my shadow, how I make light of the darkness. I reach out my hands, and touch everything.
Life is about finding your freedom, facing the pain and walking through it. Sometimes it’s okay to walk through the fire. Because sometimes it’s the only way home.
I think life asks a lot from us. More from some than others. I think we’re strong enough, brave enough, even if we don’t know it yet.
I think that when we become used to letting go, all that remains will just flow. But their will all always be hardship, and that’s ok. It’s the obstacles, the uneasiness, the pain that will make us grow.
We don’t need a way out, but a space within. To plant our feet, to place our wings. To hold on, but just lightly. To know that we’re being held, even without arms around us.
The wind whispers, ‘it’s going to be alright’. Life holds me like the stars holds its stars. Strangers bring me their light, smiles like golden hours. They fill me up and carry me.
But when I allow myself to be completely alone, I feel an emptiness. The scars deep inside, I can feel every inch of them. I taste the blood inside my tears. And their is no one to carry me, to hold me. I wonder is it because I don’t need anyone? Or is it because I have been forgotten about?
But maybe it is meant to happen, when I’m grey and old. When I have exhausted every strength, lived every ‘me’ time to its fullness. And the wind will whisper to me, ‘he has arrived.’
Hope grew from the wreckage. The sun touching it, soaking up all the poison. Life wasn’t going to be easy. But I grew stronger and learnt how to breath much deeper.
And still I stumble. But I always find my way, picking up all the broken pieces and only looking back to see how far I’ve come.
I’ve learnt so much about being grateful. Taking in every moment and treating it like a conversation I’m having with the universe.
Always remembering that life doesn’t necessarily give you what you want. That even the pain endured, is a blessing.
Knowing that any darkness will pass. That the light isn’t far away. I always hold on to this. This is how I have learnt how to survive. And realising that I am strong and brave enough to tether any storm.
This courage, I’m still trying to find. I peel back the layers that life has built around me. I won’t be fooled by my perceptions, because that’s all they are. Sometimes what is real is buried deep down underneath. So don’t get caught up in the confusion. The illusion that what you see is always real.
I’m standing on this bridge, in between two worlds. The same magic that is there in every moment, seen and unseen. I remind myself that what I’m feeling in that very moment, is not a reflection on what really is. I create dramas and worries that are only real because I make them so. That life paints a different picture. Life is always dancing and nothing can change that, even silence.
Every time I lay down my head, something pulls me further away. Like a magnet, charged by the shadows that are left behind. I cling on to them, ignoring the light that exists. And I become lost and disillusioned, by the tragedies from my past. But I know that I’m getting there, to the place that I have not known in a long time. In my heart I’m already there.